Recommendation from the author: read out loud to children!
The toys from last Christmas are all off the shelves
Almost time to start toiling (the elves tell themselves)
For Head Honcho Ho-Ho, the one who compels
A Gaggle of Gooses, a Herd of Gazelles
And soon, you can bet, a Rally of Elves
With Winken and Blinken and Fred
Yes, the elves are starting to grumble already
From iced Katmandu to the scorched Serengeti
There’s Teddi and Eddy and Nettie Spaghetti
And Mehdi and Betty and Wendy and Becky
Giuseppe and Peggy, Just Rusty and Debbie
With Winken and Blinken and Fred
Look, Clive the Slimmer, there Clive the Fatter
The one is so glad, the other one sadder
The one there is round, the other is flatter
But day or night, you know it don’t matter
Cause they’re both mad as the Mad Hatter
Like Winken and Blinken and Fred
These elves aren’t that fast but boy are they loose
They will no longer suffer abuse
Retribution starts here for years of misuse
They’ve painted their signs, they’ll picket, no truce
Couldn’t be better, here have some orange juice
Promise Winken and Blinken and Fred
